I HATE THE DRAKE

2011-02-09T09:27:00.000-08:00

PRODUCTIVITY

2010-10-22T12:12:00.000-07:00

started working on a zine. or maybe just some new drawings that won't ever be culminated into a zine. either way, after a lull in creativity I started working again. i forgot how much it sucks trying to motivate myself to start drawing.

farts,
keg

I'll never buy 30 keystone lights again. I'll never try 13 vicodin again

2010-08-27T12:17:00.000-07:00

Chicago update numero dos:

Still unemployed. bummer.
all i really want to do is work at whole foods. that's lame, i know. i don't care.
everyone else is getting lucky so my time is coming soon, i hope.
anna is living with us for a while. that's pretty cool.

The cats are pretty stoked on the place though. they do a lot of this.

stolen internet rules. sike.

i don't have a workspace yet but once i get it set up, this will be my next painting.

As much as I've always wanted to go to a proper ramen house, i'm still a vegetarian pussy. made some pretty legit stuff at home though.

Went to the MCA. saw some raymond pettibon, that was pretty cool. I need to make it to the art institute soon. been skating a lot lately. barging through the city is probably the best thing ever. good shows coming up. teenage bottlerocket tomorrow. c u there.

kissy kissy <3
keg

Everything dies baby that's a fact

2010-08-03T12:29:00.000-07:00

Unemployment mistake numero uno:

Listening to this...

...on repeat all day.

I live in a big city now. I make a great housewife. I need a job.

Catch y'all later.
heart,
keg

BURGER TIME

2010-02-19T21:12:00.000-08:00

Howdy, dudes and dudettes. It's been a while. I had a post started of my "best albums of 09" earlier last month but fuck that, it's abd. That's skate talk for "already been done". Anyway, here's a bunch of gay shit I've been up to.

This is an actual search string I used the other day. I got an emulator so I've been playing some serious NES. Fuck Burger Time anyway, Donkey Kong is where it's at.

Oh shit, 'sup Mario. Played this one? Didn't think so. Wrecking Crew.

Played this one? Doubt it. Devil World, released only in Japan and Europe due to its quasi-religious imagery and designed by Miyamoto himself.

Wait, what is tonight? Oh, Friday? What I am up to on the beginning of my weekend? Blogging and drinking beer and flipping things off.

Here's some shots of my "studio" and the art-related shit I've been doing seeing as how I'm graduating soon with my BFA in drawing. Christ.

My work space. That means the floor I covered with trash bags with all my supplies littered everywhere.

Baphomet playing Sega Genesis sketches.

Sneak peek at what I'm unleashing come May. That means any friends that read this, the first week of May is my senior show and you should set aside time to come because that would make me super happy. Details/postcards coming soon.

The best part about my "studio"? Beer cooler.

Studio practices.

Cats.

Oh yeah, a few weeks ago I went up to Chicago to visit my infinite bros Kyle and Peter and Chase and go to some gay punk rock show. Here's the account of that. It is is no order.

Chris McCaughrhtnrhahna who is in some shit band called the Lawrence Arms played a bunch of pussy songs about women or some shit. I think at one point Kyle yelled something about him being a "skinny dick bich" or something. Heckling Chicago legends who are in your favorite band is pretty fun. Reaganomics played this show too and they ruled. They have songs about cats and how drinking is better than going to work and about college students being pussies for whining about homework and drinking light beers.

After waking up still drunk on Saturday, eating brunch at the Handlebar where I hair of the dogged it, Chicago style, with a tall boy Old Style, we hung out at Kyle's and watched Beavis and Butthead and Lionheart.

How do I manage to ruin every picture ever? Bros reunited!

This picture of Evan is so badass. I was blackout hammered by this point too.

"Don't tell my roomates what I'm pointing at."

Infinite dude!

Anna and Chase in "The Chair Incident".

Julian hung out and he picked some boogers.

Pff, digi cam? Get that shit out. iPhone izwhereitsat.

Piss shot.

The wealth that can be acquired working delivery shifts at China Ex.

I'll call this "A Formal Apology to Peter Kennedy Cavanaugh For Shoving A Camera In His Face All Night" or "Let's Play Death Chant Next Time".

So yeah, that was midwest Mecca, Chi-town. The next few are stragglers that are old and that I'm too lazy to move up to the top.

Konnyaku. I dare you to try this stuff. It's a gelatinous block made out of some phallic looking plant. The Japanese use it in soups and shit. It smells like death, tastes like nothing, and has the weirdest texture ever.

Cooler shot #2. The white labeled beer in the middle is Lone Star, native to Texas but I found it at Marsh with their lame new "mix-n-match 6 pack" bottles thing. I may move to Texas just so I can drink this stuff.

Alright, I'm done. L8r h8rs.

I doubt I'll ever leave this place for years.

2009-11-18T22:19:00.000-08:00

It's kind of stupid to do a best albums so far this year in November, because next month is December and then the year is over, which means there's still some shit yet to be released whatevz, I'm bored and Kyle kind of did this a few posts ago. Speaking of Kyle, he's been posting increasingly about how punk rules. To save the trouble of me explaining, read it. There's a link to it on here. I like when he talks about this. It reminds me of that one time I had friends I could talk to music about. Well, at least music I cared about. That's hard to do here at ol' Ball State. No one likes punk. Unless by punk, you overgeneralize with hardcore or some shit. I've seen a few kids who look punk this year, but they look like street punks or something. Or that they're into Anti-Flag. I saw this kid at a party a while back that had a Jawbreaker shirt on and I tried to tell him it ruled but he sucked and was either too taken aback by my excitement or just a turd. Either way, it was right after Good Luck played at the Back to School show at VGR. That show was fun. I got drunk off of beers in Jimmy John's cups and maybe a few drinks at Mad Hatter and then screamed every song. I was the only person besides Zach Melton and the band Good Luck toured with that knew them. Kind of a bummer considering three years ago, Muncie would have been all over them. Oh well... where was I? Oh yeah, albums so far this year:

We'll start with 7"s

Lawrence Arms - Buttsweat and Tears

Lemuria - Ozzy.

I liked the Strike Anywhere one, Iron Front. But just the 7".

Get Bent is broken up but I think the Dead It EP was just released like a month or so ago. If that's the case, that album is good. I like it better than the new Iron Chic.

Full lengths

Banner Pilot - Collapser duh.

Cobra Skulls - American Rubicon

I think the Chris Wollard album was actually released this year even though I had it way before but that one was good.

That may be it. This will be revised later obviously. Good bands have released mediocre stuff this year though. Teenage Bottlerocket was only alright. Dead to Me sucked. Chuck Ragan was boring. Lucero wasn't bad but I wouldn't say I loved it like these others. The new Andrew Jackson Jihad is alright. Non-punk stuff? The new Baroness is pretty badass. The new Graf Orlock was pretty alright. Have you guys heard Lady Gaga? Holy shit, so fucking good. Oh man, I cannot get enough of her/him. I mean, definitely the best.

That's all I've got really. Oh yeah, I got a Dreamcast for my birthday and I thought I'd be able to burn games but fuck that. I've wasted so many CD-Rs so far and gotten nowhere. Looks like I'm paying for them. Also, I went to Dave and Buster's for my birthday and that place is badass. I just wish they would have had some fighters. Okayi'mdonebye.

If you're gonna do a nose wheelie, fuckin' do a nose wheelie, bro!

2009-08-18T18:16:00.000-07:00

Knocked two more off the summer reading list: Crack Up At the Race Riots and Bright Lights, Big City. Race Riots read pretty much like the screenplay for Gummo would. Not much more than a collection of sentences. Some were funny. Bright Lights was written by Jay McInerney, a supposed member of the "literary Brat Pack". Ellis, Tama Janowitz, and McInerney amongst others comprised this group and had little in common other than they were young, hip people writing about young, hip people. Bright Lights is if Less Than Zero were written in second person and Clay were a likable character. Or at least had any feelings. Whatevz, now I'm reading some Raymond Carver short stories. moving onnnnnn from snoozeville...

here's a cool guy I found:

I guess I'll do another day of tour de Californie. This one is short but I'll be back next time with LA.

My aunt took the day off and we spent the afternoon in Laguna visiting all the stupid little shops and watching teens head towards the beach to... well, surf or maybe get high or lay out and tan their hides or whatever it is kids do there.

This is a way cool license plate on a way cool and affordable Infiniti SUV. sike! You'd be amazed how few old vehicles exist in a town like Laguna. Everything on the road is post '08.

Speaking of cars, here's our whip during our stay. Nissan Shitter complete with missing wheel cover. Peep the next picture for evidence. When the rental car lady was showing me this car, she said "Are you sure you don't want something a little nicer? Maybe a convertible or something?" I proceeded to tell her how I have hundreds of millions of dollars in assets but I like to keep a low profile, nawmean?

kewl, thanks Enterprise!

This is probably Young Weezy or some shit.

This is my brother. Getting fresh for the art fair.

There is a summer long arts and crafts fair in the Laguna area. This is where we spent the evening, looking at old burnouts' endless beach paintings, crappy housewives' stupid jewlery and tons of discerning people walking around with wine making stupid comments. etc etc etc. Oh, and this band that played covers of 60s and 70s rock songs, complete with the tiniest baby man with a flame shirt and shredding so hard.

Gus #1

Gus #2

This guy made these weird replicas of old masters work with built up fabric and paint. It was kind of cool but his artist's statement was so dumb. Also, I touched this and a chunk fell off.

I think that's all I've got. The kids move back tomorrow. I hate move-in week so much. Fuck it. If nothing else, I'll get to see some underager get busted.

Umm, alright. L8.

Twenty some odd years and nothing's changed

2009-08-10T22:49:00.000-07:00

This line is from a Fenix TX song. This song was stuck in my head all day the other day. I don't know why. Fenix TX was a shitty, juvenile pop punk band that got popular on Blink 182's coattails. They used to be called Riverfenix until his family threatened to sue. They also had a song about a big cock, as in a rooster. Fuck man, that's dumb.

Before I go into the next installment of my vacation, here is some more recent newz:

I've been playing Counter Strike. I have a cracked version that doesn't require Steam to play. If that means anything to you, you are a dork. I just have to play on specific servers that support non-Steam play. These guys/kids/children are all very good at this game. I haven't played in 7 years and thus, am terrible. The game is frustrating. Here is what it looks like:

My eternalbrah Peter used to call a similar game "War". I like that. I think my boss calls this game "Osama".

Here are some pictures from my phone. My phone has no backlight and barely functions as a phone. These are all mostly old.

This is a drawing I did. It's about if Fred Durst ruled his own universe.

This is Zach Holt. I'm not quite sure how we accomplished his Terminator eye but it's pretty rad.

This is a grey cat who is not my cat Gus. She was at Petsmart before I decided I needed a cat and she was very nice.

This is my real cat Gus. He's a pretty kewl little dewd.

This is one time after I woke my brother up really early and made him put this mask on so I could take his picture. He immediately went back to bed.

This is just some babe I know.

I just finished listening to an album by Algernon Cadwallader and Alice and Chains came on. I shut it off immediately but I felt pretty good about that first 5 seconds of Them Bones.

Okay, here's another day of California:

We forgot to bring CDs with us so we had to cop some from our uncle. I'm pretty sure only one (maybe two) of these are his. He has several older sons so I'm guessing that's how this...

...got in there. This album sucks, by the way. The PJ and Neil Young were much more tolerable.

I-5 takes you straight along the coast all the way north and all the way south. This is in LA and clearly the best street in California.

Welcome to Six Flags Magic Mountain! Also known as...

Man, I hope you dudes know what this is. Here's another one:

Here's a parking lot shot of a few of the coasters.

Let me say a little about ol' Magic Mountain. It's inland. That means it's very hot there. It's also pretty much in a desert. Which is tight but, as stated, it's hot as shit. This particular Six Flags was in danger of going bankrupt due to gang violence in the parking lot. People (white people) were afraid to go. They cleaned up that problem and dropped ticket prices. That really just means that there's no more violence but white people still don't go. That explained why my brother and I were within the 5th percentile of non-Hispanics in the park. That includes black. I've never felt more like a minority in my life, which was actual pretty refreshing. I saw real cholos. Which I understand is a derogitory term, but you know what I mean when I say it. This:

Just more summer-appropriately dressed. I'm talking tear drop tattoos and everything. A lot of the younger kids seemed to have adopted the "scene" look. That or being punk by wearing hoodies (in 98 degrees) with Casualties patches on the back. Whatevz, it was cool and the coasters were a blast.

Overall, it was well worth the $27. Here's a view of the mountains that surround the park. There is also an eagle or a hawk or a buzzard or a stork.

On the way home, my brother made it very clear to that it was imperative that he try In-N-Out. This burger joint is the epitome of California to midwesterners, somehow. It's actual pretty legit because they only have three things on the menu (that aren't sides i.e. fries, shakes, 'n shit). Those are: Double double, cheeseburger, hamburger.

Here's Eric and his first of several double doubles throughout our trip. Apparently, they're delicious but I don't eat meat cuz I'm a vegetarianPUSSSSAY.

As stated in my prior entry, I got a nasty sunburn at Laguna Beach. As everytime I go to a beach, my sunscreen is washed off my feet and they get torched. This was no exception. Then, I walked a zillion miles through a theme park with 20 coasters or some shit. Needless to say, my feet took a serious beating in my shoes and caused the following carnage.

-CAUTION- This picture is gnarly and most I've shown have been thoroughly disgusted. But I'll leave you with the image.

PEACE!

Payne did not carry a pistol and tried not to limp

2009-07-27T16:33:00.000-07:00

This line is from The Bushwhacked Piano. It's by Thomas McGuane. I read Panama after Peter's suggestion. I wanted to see if that's how McGuane always writes. I'll let you know how I feel later.

I got A Crackup at the Race Riots by Harmony Korine. I have a feeling it's not going to be very good but I'm pretty genuinely interested in seeing how the fuck that guy writes. I'll let you know how it is.

I'm listening to Texas is the Reason and feeling weird about it. Listening to emo at 23 makes you wonder how psyched you would have been had you heard it at 16. I'm talking about real emo.

I saw this PSA today with Wanda Sykes telling kids that it isn't cool to refer to things as "gay" in lieu of "dumb" or "whacked". See that? I typed that like a square. Whacked? That's how your dad would type it. Anyway, that commerical was gay.

Enough of that. Jour, trois:

This was on the way to Laguna for our beach day. I like this because who gives a shit whether or not God surfs. Are there stickers like this for every hobby? God flies remote control airplanes. Kewl.

This is South Laguna Beach. Kind of like that MTV show but with less ugly blondes and more old fat dudes. I went to the real Laguna Beach too. It was sort of like that show. They didn't wear shirts very often and they played a lot of volleyball.

This is called the "ocean fog". It looks overcast but give it a few hours, around 2, and all this stuff is pushed inland. See the picture of my brother as an example.

This is a seagull. I threw a cherry pit at it. It tried to eat it. Seagulls are dumb.

This is a shithead kid sitting on his skimboard, contemplating whatever it is a 14 year old shithead from Laguna, California contemplates. Probably puka shells or some shit. Or the latest Wavves album.

This is my brother. He has a dent in his chest. This is right before he jumped into the ocean. Did I mention that the Pacific is fucking freezing? The water actually hurts your joints after 30 seconds.

This was at a tiny shop called "Sanchez' Soccer Shop" or "Garza's Soccer Shack" or "Valdez' Soccer Hut" or something like that. My brother wanted to look at jerseys. There was a tiny Mexican woman who was running the shop and by running the shop I mean she was watching Spanish television and not acknowledging anyone who came in.

Pretty much every city in California has signs like this. Total bummer.

Coming up next, Magic Mountain and pictures of the epic sunburn I got. sssssick.

Punk is the new black

2009-07-26T14:19:00.000-07:00

Kyle was in town last night and he left this afternoon so now I'm thoroughly bummed. To fill the void left by my eternal bro, here's day two of Californication. You know, like that RHCP song.

We had a rental car so basically, every night before we went to bed we'd decide what to do the next day. We caught wind of a shred park in San Clemente, about 20 minutes south of San Juan Capistrano, where we were staying with my aunt. LE'S DO IT.

My brother said, "Give me your camera". This is what he took a picture of. He said, "It's a Faggio, you know, from San Andreas". Referring to Grand Theft Auto. It was weird.

This is San Clemente skatepark. When skating blew up five years ago or whatever, California wanted to give kids a place to do it so they weren't grinding ollies all over their walls and shit. They found companies that would do it the cheapest who had no idea how to build skateparks. This park (and countless others just like it) was the result. Thrasher calls them "Certified Pieces of Suck". It was pretty fun though. There was also this total SoCal barney with high tube socks and Half Cabs getting gnarly on the tranny. His shirt said something about drinking a lot of beer.

After the skatepark, we went to the beach. Naturally.

I found at that when shoppping for beach front real estate, you only pay for the plot. My aunt said a lot of the time, people will just tear down the houses and rebuild when they buy a new plot. Oh yeah, those properties are worth around 4 million.

This is San Clemente pier. Hispanic folks fish off of it. You're really not supposed to do that because the bait attracts seagulls. They don't give a fukkk.

Surfer brahs! These guys were pussies. They'd pass on all the good waves and jump on these little shitters that didn't even break half of the time. Also, the Pacific is frigid. I can't imagine what it must be like to sit out there all day. But hey, whatever gets you laid.

This is a cat. He was mangy. I don't think he lived at the house he was chilling in front of.

This is my aunt's lemon tree. It's pretty tight to have a lemon tree in your front yard.

Next up, beach day and epic sunburns! I'll probably talk about food too. Catch you guys on the flipside.

People are afraid to merge on freeways in Los Angeles

2009-07-13T21:22:00.000-07:00

I'm just going to do these one day of the trip at a time because I don't want to spend the time posting eight days worth of photos and writing witty commentary for each. I can only shell out so much funny at a time, nawmean?

el primer dia:

My first flight in, uhhh, 21 years. This is the view right out of Indianpolis. kewl.

Our airline was Frontier. I had never heard of this airline before. Each plane had a different animal on its wings. They had names. My favorite was Grizwald, the Grizzly Bear.

Have you ever paid $6 to watch Tom and Jerry for an hour and 55 minute flight? God, I hope not. I wish I had a printout of how many people paid to watch TV. It was also $8 for a movie. The movies consisted of Pink Panther 2 and Inkheart.

This little dewd's foot kicked my elbow the whole way from Denver to San Diego. sssssick. Instead of being an asshole to his parents, I just shoved my camera behind me and took his picture a bunch.

Seeing the Grand Canyon from a plane is like listening to a live album.

After the rental car company made me sign a bunch of paperwork that I had no idea what any of it meant, we spent our first day at the SD Zoo. It's massive at 100 acres and is one of the best in the world.

When it's hot out, the animals just tend to chill like this meerkat. I wondered how many kids said that this dude was Timon. Or do kids even know who that is anymore?

The zoo boasts the most koalas outside of Australia. They aren't in cages at all because they're too lazy and love eucalyptus too much to go anywhere. I like koalas. They look like Gus.

An otter trying to score a tan. Speaking of which, there are a lot of disgustingly tan people. Meemaws and pop pops tend to have the best leather-skin tans.

Red pandas are one of those animals that would make badass pets. How much would that rule? Waking up with one of these dudes at your feet?

Okapis are tight because they're like part zebra, part... something else.

This was one of those exhibits where people flip their shit and dads knock over other kids and grannies to get a video of the sleeping tigers. Those tigers would like to eat the dads.

Tapirs are fucking weird.

This mandrill was weird because it stared out at all the people the whole time. It makes you wonder what this dude would be thinking if he could, you know, think.

Fucking dinosaur bird, man.

Click on this picture for the larger version and you can see a big male gorilla, which is pretty badass. This was taken from a skytram thing which was cool because you could see the whole park as well as a lot of San Diego.

There was this huge, awful mural outside the Giant Panda exhibit that was borderline racist with squinty-eyed guys and dragons and yin-yangs and shit. It looked like they brought in a bunch of different people to paint pandas and this guy on the left was definitely the best. I may need to appropriate it into a painting.

Oh yeah, the pandas. Umm, there was a 2 hour line because they're like one of a few in zoos in the world. We didn't bother waiting because pandas don't do much. Also, you can watch them online at:

http://www.sandiegozoo.org/pandacam/index.html

Stairway, eeerm, walkway to heaven. This would have been a nice convenience had it taken us somewhere we hadn't already been about five times. kewl.

They make tequila out of agave plants. Tequila makes future Rock of Love contestants.

and in the words of my immortal homie, DRE

...so just chill, until the next episode.

Boys and girls in america

2009-07-12T21:47:00.000-07:00

I finished Breakfast of Champions. I need something new to read. One time I tried to read Satanic Verses and I couldn't get into it and now I'm afraid to try Rushdie again. Besides, he's no American and I want to read something SUPERAMERICAN. Like Huck Finn. I may just read that because it's been a long time since high school. I would consider Mark Twain a good American. I want to read something that is like a mash-up of all the shit I liked in other books I've read. I think that would make a pretty good book.

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly is a pretty badass movie. Clint Eastwood was cooler when he wasn't an old asshole. "Blondie" is a good moniker for someone who isn't that blond but is closer to blond than a bunch of Mexicans. I think most of the actors in that movie are Italian or some kind of white people. I just watched Fistul of Dollars and it's nowhere near as epic as The Good...

I need to post my vacation pictures. I'll do that soon. I would just like some ideas of shit to read.

K, thx.

I play my stereo loud and it disturbs my neighbors.

2009-07-09T09:46:00.000-07:00

The title of this post is from a Beastie Boys song. It's off of Paul's Boutique. This is one of the albums I listened to during my vacation. I also listened to:

The Buzzcocks - Another Music in a Different Kitchen
Campaign - H1N1. Several times.
The Menzingers - Hold on Dodge
Nirvana - In Utero
Braid - Frame and Canvas
Waxwing - Nobody Can Take What Everybody Owns

I forgot to bring CDs to listen to in our rental car. California radio sucks unless you like MGMT or things that X103 plays, so we stole some from my uncle which I'm guessing were his sons and not his, although I could be wrong about that. They were as follows:

Suicidal Tendencies - The Art of Rebellion
Neil Young - Harvest Moon
Pearl Jam - Vs.

Vacation was fun. We did cool things. The weather was nice. The weather was better than nice. It never even looked like there might be a chance of rain. It was in the 70s except Inland, it was in the high 90s. While white people make up over 70% of California's population, it often felt much, much less than that. All of the dudes look the same. All of the girls look the same. This was odd because no one was particularly or excessively attractive. They had muscles. And they had tans. Everyone looks like a skateboarder so it was impossible to tell who actually skated. Skateboarding is illegal everywhere. You can be fined incredible amounts of money for pushing around. There is lots of elevation in California. It's nice to look out and see ocean. It's nice to look the other way and see mountains. I do not think I would like to live there. Ben Gibbard wrote a song about not understanding how you would want to live near LA. Ben Gibbard is skinny now. I saw him on Conan on the plane.

I don't like flying that much. It's nice to get across the country in four hours but it makes me feel sick and makes my ears pop a bunch. I saw the Rockies and the Grand Canyon from the plane. That was cool. I read a book and I am excited about reading again, which is good because I did not feel like it for a long time. I read Bret Easton Ellis' Less Than Zero. I'm not sure how I felt about it. I would like to discuss the book with Peter and Anna. I started Vonnegut's Breakfast of Champions. This is the only Vonnegut I've ever read. I think I feel alright about not having read Slaughterhouse yet. I like the one I am reading now.

I will post pictures soon. I have a lot of them. They are very tourist-ish. I think having a camera somewhere you've never been before makes the pictures automatically turn out tourist-y unless you're trying to take pictures of trash and bums. Or if you crop everything way down.

Indianapolis airport was the nicest one I was in. That's probably because it is so new. There was a store called "Pacific Outfitters". This is a weird shop to have in the Indianapolis airport.

What the fuck is a sesAME?

2009-04-21T07:52:00.000-07:00

Happy late holiday. I was so blazed all day, I even forgot to blog, man! Can you believe that shit? You know I had dat grape ape shit.

I woke up and smoked at 4:20 a.m. and every 5 minutes after that for 4 hours straight. A-b-b-b-baked, bruhhhh. You know Taco Bell fourth meal? I had first, second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh meal, man. I think I spent something like $114 at the T-Bell alone. I was up on dem message boards all day, talkin' 'bout "legalize that shit" and shit. And I smoked some more weed. Then about noon, my package arrived by UPS. It was that Hindu Kush I special ordered. Shit yeah!!! Got out the four footer for that one. Me and Jeff were filling that chamber like it wasn't no thing. KGB dude! Then Jeff checked the keef trap in the grinder, and fuuuuuuuukkkkkk! FULL! Busted out the piece, the honeycomb dude!, and filled like three bowls of the keef. FUUUUUUUCKKKKKKEEEEEEDDDD UPPPPPPPPPPPPP. I went into this weed-induced stupor where all I could do was talk about how high I was and I went into the kitchen and made some pasta and put doritos and chocolate syrup and maple syrup and then I stuck a frozen burrito in the middle of it all. Best shit I ever ate. Then we put the Bob Marley on and smoked 5 or 6 bowls to him, all bummed he had to get killed and miss the holiday, ya know? Then I cried a little. Then I threw up. That was from that chocolate maple burrito dorito pasta shit, man. I ain't no bitch who pukes from being too high. Then we just spaced out to Family Guy for like 2 hours or some shit. Then we smoked like 4 bowls or something, and I fell asleep. 4/20 rules so hard! Can't wait til next year!!!!

pff...

I heard he could spike a pita pit down grosscup's throat

2009-04-06T14:04:00.000-07:00

I think this is my resignation from the blogsphere. I'll probably just leave this thing up just in case I feel the need to share something with... no one? That's the best part about blogs. Everyone gets to act like no one reads it and that you like it that way. Just preface things with, "it's not like anyone reads this" and you're totally being ironic, right?

It's not like anyone reads this but... I'm a furry. It's cool, cuz, like, I like animals and stuff but, you know, it's illegal to fuck them or whatever, so, like, instead of fucking real animals, which I would like to do, I can go to these conventions and find, you know, like, a sexy little fox, and we can have a good ol' romp in the hay, so to speak. Cuz we're furries and that's what we do. God, I'm glad I can say this to no one. Ya know, cuz no one reads this hahahalollerz.

But yeah, I feel like anything I want to say comes out sounding like... a blog. Which is dumb. So unless I have some photos from the next furry convention or get some sort of burst of, like, super creative poetic thoughts about life and all its beauty or draw a cool picture of a unicorn being fisted by patrick stewart or make a ground beef sculpture of a turtle that I actually bake and serve to the homeless or pictures from when me and my boyfriend go to some super classy sushi restaurant and drink martinis and look really cute or when I model my new spring crocs. Yeah.

l8r, sk8rs.

Indian food'll tear the shit out of your stomach

2009-03-03T12:58:00.000-08:00

Holy shit, I love finding new bands that rule. Mountain Asleep out of Louisville, kill is so hard. Hardcore that's interesting? In 2009? Who knew? Looks like they're going on tour soon and coming to Bloomington. I guess I'll probably be going since they offer this album for free download.

Christ, that rules.

50 posts!

2009-02-26T15:55:00.000-08:00

Wow, that's exciting. I've wasted way more time than it is worth on this thing.

I got some new shoes today. Van Wastell Chukka Lows. I feel kind of bad skating in them since he died and all. Oh well. I'll post a video in his honor.

Dude was sick.

Anyway, it's been a while since I've ordered shoes, skate shoes at that. I've decided to dedicate this 50th post to all the skate shoes I've owned. These are not all of them, but I can't remember the other ones. Most of these are pretty tight.

Etnies Sal 23. sick

eS Koston Ones. sick.

Emerica Reynolds 2 brown/bling/bling sukkkka. these were the shit during their day. I rocked the Pissdrunx white button-up at this time too.

Vans Rowleys. These lasted maybe a month or so but they're sick.

Emerica Francis. these were alright. I think I still have them somewhere.

Emerica Templeton 2s, navy. everybody had these.

These were my first "skate" shoes. I rocked these with duct tape for way longer than I should have. I also pushed shit foot.

Jesus, Fallen Rivals. these things are fucking hulks.

Emerica Kirchart 2s. beasts.

Nike Mavrk. I traded my brother these for his Lakai Kostons.

Emerica Ellingtons. everyone had these too.

Lakai Koston Ones. I couldn't find the regular ones with the black sole but these are close.

I can't think of anything more punk rock than cats.

2009-02-23T13:20:00.000-08:00

I'm sicker than shit. I've been mildly ill for over a week. Today, the bomb dropped. It's pretty cool.

In other news, there was all this hubbub about last.fm giving information to the RIAA concerning the leaked U2 album. last.fm denied saying that it goes against everything that they stand for. RIAA, of course, declined to comment. I hope U2 becomes the new Metallica.

Speaking of Metallica, I got a cat. He is the equivalent of Het circa 1983. Except with a slight weight problem. Which I guess makes him the equivalent to Het circa 2009. Pff, I'm talking about 'tude, not spare tires.

CATS!

Myspace: the scourge of music

2009-02-20T05:28:00.000-08:00

We all know that myspace is a shitty forum for shitty metalcore bands to gain relative notoriety amongst other bands/shithead kids who are into the same stuff. At Dawn, There Will Be Blood can friend The Blackest Plague and they can pretend to book a show together. They're 17 (or 25?) and (hopefully) they'll grow up soon and realize that metalcore sucks and move onto better things. They can take promo shots with their hyper-styled hair and white belts and myspace girls will cream their shorts and the rest of the world goes on, unaffected. I have no problem with this.

I cannot even remember the events that led me to look at this on last.fm, but here I find myself looking at a band called Porcelain and the Tramps. Wait, what?!?! Porcelain and the Tramps?! This cannot be serious. I mean look at this person.

Are you fucking shitting me? Nevermind the purple hair. People are still into that whole gas mask aesthetic? Oh wait, I think I recall seeing a photo just like this in AJ yesterday. ooooooh, harsh. Straight from last.fm:
"she had the talent of singing, rapping, and dancing. But of course being a white female with blonde hair and blue-greenish eyes, she wasn’t taken too seriously." Christ. "Until the age of nine she grew up on the streets of 8 Mile". STREET CRED.

So like all other "bands" that gain their popularity on myspace this person does not have an actual album. So how, on last.fm, does the song "Fuck Like a Star" gain almost 4000 plays over the past 6 months? HOW?!?! Are they actually downloading the song off of myspace? That's a logical explanation but then how are there songs with 2000 plays that aren't currently on her myspace? I'm so perplexed right now, I can feel my body shut down.

Imagine being one of these kids, the ones who really dig Brokencyde (BC13!!) and wear all the bright colors and have fucked up hair and the high tops and shit, at age 20. That is equivalent to us being bummed on Korn or something. We were so into it in middle school but now it's just kind of embarassing. The question is, do these kids even stand a chance of moving on and finding even slightly better music? Not to say that they'll be into Hollywood Undead for the of their lives but just another version of it. Well, they might still be into Hollywood Undead in four years if that band had any staying power. But they don't, they'll be a blip on myspace's god awful radar, and the kids will move onto whatever shitty thing they can find next.

I could go on about this for days, but I'll spare myself having to think about this anymore. One last note, I found this kid that goes under the moniker Dot Dot Curve [ :) get it?!?!?hahahaha] that is from Greenwood. That is the perfect metaphor for what I've been talking about.

Fuck, I'm going to listen to Dillinger Four.

My heart pumps THC

2009-02-16T21:53:00.000-08:00

This band is tagged folk-punk on last.fm and gets against me references. I don't get that shit, but they're pretty damn good. New album "neon creeps" just got it's official asian man release this month.

Shiiiiit. When did this thing become a music blog? Whack.

I got a cat. kewl.

IMPRESS YOURSELF

2009-02-04T07:42:00.000-08:00

Kyle's gonna give me shit for this one, but whatevzzzzz. I would not have had access to a band like Braid back then. A band that broke up in 1999? Jesus, I was only 14. I don't even think I knew what "emo" was and if I did, it was as distorted as the rest of the world's view on it. In eighth grade, I think I was probably still listening to Green Day and Weird Al and shit.

I was going to go through this whole progression of my musical tastes, but that's a pretty lame thing to do. And boring. Especially because all I really wanted to say is that, a decade broken up or not, Braid is a good band. A good band that I just discovered a few months ago. Sorry to the original emo fans. I am sucking your pitiful souls dry.

Dear textmonster,

2009-02-02T11:37:00.000-08:00

tights are not pants.

love,
kraig edward goddard.

Where have I been all your life.

2009-01-23T04:58:00.000-08:00

Jesus. Why did I agree to open on Fridays? 7:30? Bad call, maaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnn.

We spent a pretty good night at the bar last night. Everyone seemed to be having a good time, despite the fact we were at the Chug. Everyone is an overstatement. Kyle will say, "last night was alright". Or, "the Chug sucks, man". Or, "I'm never going to a bar again".

I can't wait for my boss to get in so I can go get some shitty chips from the vending machine. From there, I feel, things will start to look up.

DEATH TO ALL PRICKS

2009-01-20T13:08:00.000-08:00

I've probably titled a blog this before. I'm too lazy to check.

So, I ordered Kitchen Confidential with an Amazon gift card Anna got me for Christmas. Anthony Bourdain is somewhat of a celebrity now, which is cool. I think he's kind of bummed on all the attention he's garnered, which I enjoy. The book is the "extended edition" which means he got super popular and people wanted to hear what he had to say about his new-found celebrity. In the little introduction, he makes it pretty obvious he resents the fact that he has a show. Not only that, but a wildly popular show and is surrounded by the people he dislikes. This being the celebrity chef.

Like a lot of people my age, I saw No Reservations and decided that he was America's Biggest Badass. He drinks. A lot. I like that. He smokes Reds. He justifies and condones his smoking. I like that too. He is a great ambassador for this country because, while he looks American as shit, he is always incredibly reverent of the cultures he visits. He cusses. There is a disclaimer before the show starts that the content is questionable. I often wonder why, especially with VH1's Celebreality and an entire horde of other "questionable" programs that have no disclaimer. My guess is that they don't want kids seeing this total hardass and thinking that's how they should be. And trust me, that's how they should be. But maybe moms wouldn't be into that.

I don't know where I'm going with this, but the dude is legit.

On an unrelated note, good ol' Matt Erler of Ball State's own Daily News wrote an editorial today about everybody's favorite band.

Peep it here... http://media.www.bsudailynews.com/media/storage/paper849/news/2009/01/20/Forum/Hipster.Is.The.New.Hippie.AvantGarde.Band.Shifts.Style.To.Mainstream-3589316.shtml

I'm not going to say a lot except I no longer give a shit about Animal Collective. I've been a fan since Feels, which ain't saying much about my "since the beginning" cred, but I've undoubtedly enjoyed their albums. I've given a few listens to the new one, Merriweather Post Pavillion for the un-hip, and have decided that I don't care about them anymore. Matt Erler was not the ultimate deciding factor, but he was the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak.

If you don't feel like reading the article, he criticized the band's previous albums for being too "avant-garde" and pretentious while praising the new one for "melodic vibrancy", which oddly enough has been a huge part of the what the band was about from the beginning. Whatevz.

I'm going to go listen to Latterman.

The finest day I've ever had was when I learned to cry on command

2009-01-17T18:06:00.000-08:00

Why is Nirvana's fan base so embarrassing? Every comment on this video is about the guitar Kurt is playing. They care enough to argue what model guitar he is playing over a youtube comment board. If it's not that, it's the same RIP bullshit. Poor dude is rolling in his grave.

Wisdom teeth are cool

2009-01-14T08:26:00.000-08:00

I just looked at this music blog that I haven't checked in a while, and I noticed that the dude posted his obligatory "Best of 2008" list. This is not surprising. I think everyone that has a blog is totally down with music and typically makes one of these toward the end of the year. So, to keep with blog tradition, here is mine, two weeks late:

1. Lil Wayne - Tha Carter III

Shiiit, son. What's do be said that hasn't already been said about Weezy? He's one bad dude. He's got a lot of money. You know, a-milli? He's got a tattoo that signifies he killed someone. Wikipedia just told me that he played the Tin Man in his school's production of the Wiz. Also, vocoders are cool and I hope they stick around in the hip hop industry for the next decade.

2. Kanye West - 808s and Heartbreak

This is making me seem like I really love hip hop. Pff, shit. I do. Again, vocoder, man. T-Pain brought that shit to the forefront and everyone was like, "damn, that sounds good. And obviously that's what everyone is digging on right now. I ought to take everything that previously made me interesting and toss dat shit down the toilet." But shit, what can I say? Ol' Kanye lost his mom to plastic surgery complications in 2007. He had to express his pain. His T-Pain.

3. Girl Talk - Feed the Animals

Yoooooo, ever heard this dude? He takes, like, mad samples. Like, top 40 hip hop shit, and he mixes it with like some alternative music or something. I wikipedia'd it and there was some shit called the Butthole Surfers. I never heard of that, but you know the dude is eclectic.

4. Vampire Weekend - S/T

So, total hype band, right? Well, they back it up. Seriously, every blog across the interweb was creaming their pants over this. Well, I heard them first. Like, literally first. So, when they started blowing up, I was all, "whatevs". But man, then they were on MTV with "Oxford Comma" and I said to myself, "They've made it." Then I gave them a call, or attempted to, to tell them they owe me some money because if it weren't for me, they would have never made it so big. I got as far as their record label and the lady told me that I couldn't talk to them. I said, "eff it" and smoked a huge bowl. Listening to "A-Punk".

5. Fleet Foxes - S/T

I don't think I've ever actually listened to this band, but everyone else is flipping their shit about the album, so I had better make this list seem legit. I mean, what a gorgeous album. Definitely the most original and creative thing to come out in the last 25 years.

6. Beach House - Devotion

I like to think of Devotion as the soundtrack to the most beautiful film never made. Like, American Beauty or some shit. When the bag is floating and around and around and shit.

7. Crystal Castles - S/T

Out of all the really great bands that have been around for more than a year, it seems that debut albums top my list this year. That just goes to show that music is just getting so stagnant, y'know? Every band that came out with an album prior to 2008 should probably just quit.

8. Gaslight Anthem - '59

Yeah! Everyone is all over this band. And it's justified, you know? They sound like no other band I've ever heard. Ever. Keep an eye out for these scruffy young men. Mothers, lock up your daughters and fathers, watch yr ass.

9. Britney Spears - Circus

COMEBACK ALERT!

10. Sigur Ros - Kfjra Iirkrslllr Edk Irrssffc

I don't really understand this band. Neither what they're saying nor what they're trying to sound like or all about. But I don't really care. I heard they are classified as "post-rock", which doesn't make any sense because isn't rock still alive and well. I mean, AC/DC just came out with a new album. Not to mention Buckcherry.

Okay, now for real, I'll do like a top 5 or something. I won't say whether this is in order or anything, but these albums killed this year.

1. Polar Bear Club - Sometime Things Just Disappear
2. LaGrecia - On Parallels
3. Algernon Cadwallader - Some Kind of Cadwallader
4. Banner Pilot - Resignation Day
5. Torche - Meanderthal

Did that Hot Water b-sides collection come out this year? If so, that's on here. Ummm, I've been digging this Bridge and Tunnel album. Ummm, god. Music sucks. The WHY? album was pretty good. I liked the new Fucked Up. The Nick Cave was pretty good. Oh SHIT! MARGOT! THAT'S NUMBER ONE FOR SURE! THE NEW MARGOT!

I'm done. 2009 predictions:

BOOZE.

yadadamee?

2009-01-12T17:38:00.000-08:00

Not since the Gonz's kickflip on a bike video have I been so psyched on something skating related.

I present... Jamal Smith.

This is not a test, even at its best.

2009-01-06T22:45:00.000-08:00

That's all I've got, really. It's January and all I find myself wondering is, "where's the snow". A whole month and then some and not a decent snow. I hope to wake up tomorrow to a full on blizzard.

I'll go spend the rest of my money on booze at 10 am and I won't look back. I'll listen to this Bridge and Tunnel album I just got and I'll feel alright about things.

-edit- Bridge and Tunnel are not really that org at all. I based it on, like 3 tracks. It's still a pretty good album.

My goal is to own No Idea Records. I'll give myself five years to accomplish this goal.

I'm going to paint this world plaid.

It's hard to find a well, whatever. Nevermind.

2008-12-23T23:47:00.000-08:00

High. My name is Kraig. This post will be things about me. These things are either factual or fictional. You decide.

1. I am currently drunk. I have had a Sparks and five Budweisers. I am currently working on my sixth. These Budweisers happen to be tall boys.

2. I am drinking Budweiser tall boys because the Friendly Package was out of Pabst.

3. I wanted South Paw but that only comes in 12 packs and I'm leaving for home tomorrow. Chances are, I would not drink all 12 tonight.

4. I am still stuck in Muncie tonight because of the ice storm.

5. I am currently thinking about people who were interesting in high school, like Walter Beck who liked GWAR more than any other band ever.

6. For Christmas, I would like for people to never refer to it as X-Mas.

7. For Christmas, I would like anything Nirvana related.

8. Brett Lewis is currently asleep on my couch.

9. I am currently bummed I could not be Hendricks County so I could go to BW3s with Peter.

10. Speaking of Peter, I should document my Fred Durst drawing for Tulip.

What's yer medi-chlorian count?

2008-11-17T09:30:00.000-08:00

Friday night was penny's so that means? Drunk idiot with a camera. You knew it was coming.

I'll mention that this was Pat's first time to penny pitchers. All he could say was, "look at all the beer".

And Saturday, Org birthday blowout. I think I'll keep a running plaid count. Evan has better pictures so if she posts them, check it out.

The earliest arrivals. Let's see, plaid count is at 4.

Lord Zed and Lare-bear.

Abey-baby. Number 5.

Katie promised to wish me happy birthday every time she saw me. I'm pretty sure she kept true to her word. Numbers 7 and 8.

Chad, Zach and some rad dewd. Number 9.

This is single handedly the grossest thing I've ever seen.

I was stoned off my ASS.

Daddddddddy.

10 and 11.

Number 12.

This is just how Torma showed up. He had not idea there was a theme for the party.

You can see Zack's flannel in this one, so that's number 13.

Brent smiles?

Justin Spring, 14. Yellow hat Kenzie had a jacket too so that's 15.

B Lew's hat, 16. You can see Pat and I know he had some on so that's 17.

Proud daddies.

I think this is when I got my camera back from Kyle.

I was wearing two, so that's 18 and 19.

Larry was so psyched on Star Wars all night. He also loves salsa music.

Zolt said he wants this blown up to 8 ft. x 6 ft. so he can hang it on his wall.

'Sup, babe?

I have no idea what this face is or why I did it so much.

Jesus, sorry.

Obviously, the two orgest dudes at the party. I'll Photoshop Steve in here and we'll be set.

Alright, so here's the wrap up:
- The keg got slaughtered in close to two hours.
-Aside from everyone who brought their own stuff, Anna bought two bricks, I bought one, and Kyle bought one. That's a hundred and twenty beers.
-Pete took a bus all the way from Chicago for the festivities.
-My laptop got stolen, which I'm totally psyched on.
-We packed the house, again.
-Cops showed up but stayed outside and chilled. We just had to keep it down.
-Org was on the stereo until Harvey showed up. And people stuck around.
-Some beer bong bros showed up and humped everything in sight.
-All in all, this was my favorite party we've had. I may be biased because it was my birthday and Hot Water was being played, but man I had a blast. Thanks to everyone who came out. And thanks to the dude who stole my laptop. SSSSSSSSSSICK.

...and the aftermath.

Until next time.

Halloween 2K8

2008-11-03T07:33:00.000-08:00

Here is an out of order summation of the Halloween weekend.

Ghoulie Daddy.

Craftiest costume of the night goes to Evan. Tornado!

Paperboy keeping hydrated pre-nipple ring.

Brett's toddler Elmo costume was eighteen sizes too small. He had to turn his whole body to look at you.

Eddie Munster? Nah, Teen Wolf.

Dill Street prior to party-time.

Some daddies in a sea of sluts.

Art faggery 101.

Extra cheesy?

Drunk idiot with a camera.

Anna loves Wilson. Especially when he makes comments about assassinating Obama.

Daddies singing Toad and the Wet Sprocket.

FUCK YOU, WILSON

Babooshka Lewis.

This series is entitled "Amish Discovers Halloween".

Pamela and Natalie Portman. Or ScarJo.

Lynn and Zolt doin' the Zolt.

Wooley as something. I never asked.

Andrea as Borat. Very nice!

Brett mackin' hard.

Count Millner.

The other toddler Elmo apparently forgot it was Halloween.

BOOBS

"Take a picture of my white pants".

Ghoul mask.

Anna's closest foray into dressing up for Halloween.

This series is entitled, "Kyle Kisses the World".

Charles? Check.

"mmm, salty".

Mitch.

Foreverheart scored a beej.

G's acting like gents.

Evan somehow evaded having her face slobbered all over.

Maxi-bulk 3000.

Ort's fronts, blangin'.

'Sup, babe?

Black metal Bechtel. Blechtel?

Brett, on Saturday. Apparently dressing up as trash offers a lot more mobility than an undersized Elmo costume.

BFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF.

This was a monster Pac Man ghost costume. The dudes flipped when we even got near them.

Bad Chad.

Satanism by Binks.

After Evan's, we hit up Do's.

Squints.

Did I mention Steve was back in town for the KS reunion show? Oh, well he was.

Infinite dudes.

Until next year, peace out to Satan's favorite holiday.

Those Texas cops are mean, man.

2008-10-23T08:58:00.000-07:00

What to write about... I'm at work from 11 to 2 on Thursdays. That's a lot of time to sit on the internet. I'm out of things to look at by about 11:30. My guess is that if I start writing in the blogsphere, I'll waste another, oh, fifteen minutes. Hmm... well.

How about Halloween? That works. Kyle is set on Paperboy and says I should do Little Mac from Punch Out. I think it's a good idea. I just don't know how recognizable a dude in a black wife beater, green shorts, and green gloves will be. My guess is that boxing gloves ain't cheap, especially when weighed against "what are you supposed to be?" all night. Add a beard, which I am not willing to shave, and you've got confused looks all around. Speaking of my beard, if you're expecting to see another shaving spectacle during the party this year, you can forget about it. You shave during the summer, when it's pretty much necessary. Not during the fall when it's about to get as cold as Stephanie Kaye's disposition towards Arthur. Speaking of Degrassi, I want to be the Zit Remedy. Kyle thinks that's pretty gay, which it is, but fuck if Halloween isn't about being gay. I wore a dress last year. There's going to be three million Jokers running around with their knives, shoving it up to people's mouths all over the nation. That's gay. Couples? There will be a million Margot and Richie Tenenbaums. Gay. God, Halloween is just gay. I'd rather skip the costumes, drink copious amounts of beer, and talk about how gay Halloween is. The part that pisses me off is the snobbery put into. Yeah, dude. Good for you for dropping close to a hundred dollars on your Batman as a Warhol painting costume. Way to go on that Ultimate Warrior outfit. Give it, oh, eight hours and that costume is worthless and you'll never be able to use it again or you'll get called out. Meanwhile, I'll spend $8 on a Mickey's, a Sparks, and a six pack of Pabst for my "drunk" costume and I guarantee I'll have a better time especially because I don't have to mind my giant chicken feathers all night or whatever. Okay, the "drunk" costume is gay. I think only rednecks do that one. I'll spend maybe $10 on a yellow sweatshirt and some puffy paint for my Zit Remedy costume and anyone who is cool (aka, watches Degrassi) will get a kick, I'll feel good about myself, and I can still drink comfortably without having to mind a bird beak or something. Or pour beer down some hole where my mouth is because I built this big, dumb box contraption that lights up and shit.

Shit, I'm not against anyone who goes all out. I think it's really cool when people care enough to put in the effort to make a badass costume. Especially when it's spot on and doesn't look like a craft store's worst nightmare. Like... oh... Steve's costume last year. That ruled. Even Joe Ozinga's was cool, despite it being Wes Anderson and a film that had been in the theater for like maybe a month. Nonetheless, they looked good. But to me, Halloween is a party, therefore I treat it like one. That means drinking, dancing, and having fun. If your Cloverfield costume kicks the shit out of my Zit Remedy costume, fuck it. Let's drink and have a good time. I guess that's all I'm trying to get out.

Which reminds me of this SHITTY costume I had when I was a kid. Creative? Yes. Resourceful? Yes. But got, it was gay. Halloween is pretty soon after my brother's birthday. He had all these birthday hats. You know, the pointy ones? I spray painted those black and made this shitty monster mask thing out of them. God, it looked stupid. My mom did my makeup, I wore black sweats, and I made a stupid broken chain necklace thing out of tin foil. Jesus. I was a smash fuck.

Here's a costume idea. Be a blogger. Sit at home, DO NOT go to any parties. Just be really bitter and type the night away.

Drunk idiot with a camera

2008-10-19T13:25:00.000-07:00

This was the weekend.

Thursday:

A couple daddies.

Pussy Control. Or pussy patrol.

Kyle, probably singing Green Day's "Good Riddance".

JJ's crew.

These next few pictures are from the series "Megan Likes to Have Her Picture Taken".

Zolt, expressing his thoughts on the evening.

FALL BREAK!

Zach, trying to get kicked out by laying on the air hockey table.

The epitome of "daddy".

Infinite dudes, slangin' suds.

Pff, not gay.

DADDDDDDYYYYYY.

Anna is fond of Kyle.

By Zach Holt.

Abe, playing air hockey with a pitcher. Except not really because it's broken.

Drinking makes people hungry.

When I was showing him these pictures, Kyle was reminded that he got pizza.

The following pictures are all part of this new photography style I invented where you stick your camera as close to a person's face as you can. It is both annoying and weird. It creates unflattering pictures and that is why I will share them. Enjoy:

Zach's tongue can do weird things.

This is the inside of Anna's mouth.

This is pretty classic.

Anna likes to drink AMFs.

Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's Maybelliene.

Friday:

You get one picture and it's from pennies at Dill Street. That explains why you get one picture.

Saturday:

Green punch at the Green House. Fitting.

Cute.

What's up, Chad?

Zed came up. Sweet.

Daddy Zolt, looking fresh.

Party-time Binks.

Too cool doods.

And Saturday's "drunk idiot with a camera":

I have no idea who this is.

I have no idea what this is.

Risky business.

Sparks tongue? I don't know who this either.

Beardy Gavin Rossdale.

Jessie, looking psyched.

Daddy's mustache.

I think this is Evan.

Classic Forster.

Cool dude Sean. Or Shawn?

I think this is Evan too.

Hopefully, that is the end of drunk idiot with a camera. But again, booze does that. And lord knows I love booze.

Daddy²

2008-10-15T05:22:00.000-07:00

It's 8:30. I've been up since 6:57 and at work since 7:30. I got my retribution when the girl called at exactly 7:30 asking for a laptop, which we had three of, and I told her no, unfortunately we don't have any. Small things like that can make being up so early, riding your bike in the rain to your stupid, worthless campus job worth it. It gives me a sort of power over our patrons that I like. You desperately want a laptop? You've checked every hour on the hour for the past three weeks straight? Man, I wish I could help. We just don't have anything in right now, except for three PCs and a Macbook Pro. I'm just not willing to help you out because you are OBNOXIOUS. Just buy your own goddamn laptop. I'm sure you have student loans or access to some other money that's not yours. Use that and save me the hassle of having to deal with you. I know what you're thinking, right? I'm employed at Ball State University, providing a free service to the other students of this campus. And I have had a work laptop for over a year. Yeah, so what. I lucked into the job, I get the computer. I deal with dumbasses on a daily basis, I get to bitch. Sheeeeit.

Last night was our first night at the new Doc's on Dill Street and its second night of being open. Isn't that a clever name? Alliteration? Shit yeah! I mean yeah right. So the name sucks and you know what else it means? All the people who, for whatever reasons, won't go downtown but still totally dig the "vibe" of the real Doc's will be there. That means bros who are really infatuated with Rastafarian culture, reggae, and above all else, weed. Essentially, dumb people. And the sluts who dress up on a Tuesday night to tag around with those assholes. And then the general Dill Street/Motini's/Chug/Locker Room riff-raff who wander in wasted. The whole time I was inside, I couldn't help but to feel my spirit being crushed. Here I was, in the bar that I have so many good memories (and where I have forgotten even more), and it's not filled with the people that I usually associate with it. So that was the biggest problem, obviously. Whatever, you can't expect a bar to change management and association and not change on the inside. But god dammit, they had better get something in there besides one keg of PBR that runs out after the first day, liquor, and a bunch of shitty ass bottled beer. I know it's a new bar, but christ! The most essential thing to me at a bar is cheap drinks, preferably dumpy, canned beer. Since Mo'z clozed we've been at the Chug, which I understand is probably one of the worst places on earth, but shit if they don't have $1.25 High Life and a good assortment of the beers that make me feel like a working man. Even the real Doc's has things I care to drink. Not to mention $1 wells on Tuesdays. These drink specials had better make their way to this scab of a bar called Do's. Get it? Pat coined that, so I give him his credit. Another thing they had were these god awful, heavy monster mug things. Six bucks for tennis elbow, carpal tunnel, and shitty Miller Lite? Not to mention, if you're wasted and you end up with one of those 1) you'll be way more wasted and 2) good luck holding onto that thing. I feel sorry for anyone who decides to hang out downstairs because of the inevitable hailstorm that will be those mugs. What else? Remember when I was talking about the Doc's crowd earlier? You know how the real Doc's manages to get that demographic into that bar? Shitty, shitty fake reggae, feel-good bullshit. So guess what makes it's way to Do's? Yeah. Not only that but they plan on having live music six days a week. What the fuck? Come on, seriously. Most live music in this town sucks so much ass, it's unbelievable. Do you really want these talentless hacks playing their awful original compositions and covers of the same songs you've been listening to all night? All night, six nights a week? For fuck's sake, I don't even want to think about it. Also, I heard talk of removal of the pool table. Hopefully they'll just cover it with a board or something and make it a hookah area. But seriously, what do they expect people to do. It's a bar and people need something else to distract them from the shitty music and even shittier conversation happening all around them. Why do you think the Chug has fucking skee-ball? With any luck, this place will close at 1. That would be the nail in the coffin.

I'm done. Seriously, I'm pissed off now and it's only 9. I didn't want to waste so much time complaining about that so I'd have some time to do my response to Kyle's "quirks" post. Whatevs. Another day, I suppose. Scotty's tonight. That should make up for it.

Insert Lawrence Arms lyric here

2008-10-10T10:55:00.000-07:00

So, I was reading older posts on Brendan Kelly's blog and he had one where he was going through a list of what makes him a nerd. While scrolling through the list, and saying "check" to myself for everything he rattled off, I decided that I should probably make my own list in this vein. Self proclaiming yourself a nerd is pretty lame, I realize, but there were a few that he didn't name that I was into and I feel I should share with the internet. Internet being Anna? Evan? Maybe Kyle. I think that's everyone who reads this. Anyway, here goes.

1) Magic: The Gathering. A card game. You are supposedly a wizard with shit tons of badass powers at your disposal. You can cast spells, summon monsters, artifacts, and other stuff. And it's a card game. So you're not really doing any of this (pfff, obviously) but rather, pretending you're casting these spells and beating the fuck out of carrion beetles and bog wraiths by fictional representation on a card drawn by some Frank Frezetta ripoff. Speaking of which, I'm going to be a dude that draws for Magic cards. That is my life goal. Thank god that's what I'm going to school for.

Alright so playing this makes you a nerd. Duh. And I was way into it. My friend Matt bought something like 500 cards one time and we would just sit around, looking at the pictures, talking about how badass this 12/12 wall is, or how much shit we could fuck up with this Armageddon spell, and building decks. And that's it. We actually very rarely played. We played each other. Sometimes I played myself or my brother. So I guess I'm not that big of a nerd because I never went to tournaments at the comic book store or anything like that. Fuck it, I'm going to Wizard's Keep tonight.

2) In the same vein, and way worse, I played Dragon Ball Z cards. This one I actually went to a tournament for. At a comic book store. I lost. Miserably. God, Dragon Ball Z is badass. I can't really remember how to play the game at all. I could still play Magic just fine. Man, you know what the worst part about these games is? They're too god damn expensive. I just looked up prices on booster packs (like 10 cards) and they're almost $9 a pack. Jesus. I can't believe I dropped money on shit like this. I could have had so much more candy or dollar store bullshit and Taco Bell. Oh well. Expensive brings me to my next topic...

3) Warhammer. God dammit, this game is stupid. Okay, the concept is awesome. Like D&D but without a dungeon master and fake rules and shit. You control an army of elves, orcs, dwarves, goblins, etc. and you try to fuck up your opponent. Each piece has a designated ability, hit points, weaknesses, strengths whatevs. You build your battle field out of fake grass and rocks and shit and you battle 'til the death. I'm assuming there's more to it than that but that's my point. I NEVER GOT TO PLAY THE GAME BECAUSE IT'S TOO FUCKING EXPENSIVE. That's why it sucks. You spend more money, you kick more ass. So here I am, psyched on this sweet game and goblins and shit, but oh wait, you have to drop two grand before you can even start playing?!?! Jesus. Actually, I more enjoyed reading the manuals and watching other people play. Yeah, I went to Games Workshop, hung out with other nerds and pretended like I was going to get my army together and start playing. Yeah right. Man, if I ever get rich, that's the first thing I'm doing. Get my Skaven army together and lay this world to waste.

4) Brendan mentioned comic books. I don't give a shit about comic books, per se, but he did mention one thing that got me super psyched. THE TICK. Not just the show. Most kids my age watched Fox on Saturday mornings. Cool people watched the Tick. I was one of those. But my love for the Tick extended to reading the original comic series written by Ben Edlund and published in 1988. I have an original pressing (not mint, bummer) of the Tick #1 and then represses of of 2-6, a repress of the Omnibus (a book of 1-6) just to name a few. I used to get a New England Comics Press catalog, take what little money I had, give it to my mom who got me a money order (shit! money order!), send it out and like three weeks later, I'd get my package containing the Tick #4 or whatever. I should get the other books of the first series and read those because I still don't what happens.

5) God, I loved Final Fantasy VII. I mean, I loved this game. One time as punishment, I was grounded from the game. Not from anything else, I just was NOT allowed to play this game. So of course, I snuck over to a friends and played. Shit, mom. I HAVE TO PLAY!!!!!! I don't know what it is about it. Awesome characters? Check. Cloud Strife is one badass protagonist. Vincent rules even though he sucks after like level 70. Cid is awesome. Everyone hates Yuffie, but I love her. The story is incredible. It came out in 1997 for the PS1 and the graphics are so amazing for that time. God, Sephiroth rules and the final boss battle is so epic. I always tell myself I'm going to start it again, but god dammit if Midgar isn't the most boring thing ever and it takes forever before you can get out on the world map. Anyway, yeah this game is awesome and I love it.

This is getting lengthy and I'm sure your attentions are waning. I'll wrap it up. Here's a few other things to close with. Star Trek, Star Wars, Pokemon, various other RPGs, I have a pretty disgusting knowledge of rock n' roll history, daddy daddy daddy.

Durrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

I apologize if you read all that. If you did, congratulations. Let's play some Magic. Seriously, who wants to play with me? I've still got a deck at home somewhere.

Let's sing a song about smoke and flames

2008-10-08T05:00:00.000-07:00

Sick:

Sick in the sense of awesome. Wait, is that sick? Myspace? Hey, the album still rules so I'll go with yes, that's sick.

Not so sick:

When you think you found a cool band, but they only have one good song. Weird name, DANANANANAYKROYD. This song rules but venture no further, you'll be glad you didn't.

So long, Astoria

2008-10-05T14:33:00.000-07:00

Second story beer pong. Cool concept, not actually that fun.

Inevitably, shit like this happens. This is on the balcony below Chase's.

A "crane" was rigged which consisted of string and a Jones' soda can.

The can had to be swung to knock the ball off the lower balcony. This was much easier than going downstairs and seeing if the people were home. It lead to warm beer and a one hour game.

The trolley on the way to Muncie Music Fest! SICK!

Doc's. This band sucked.

What are you so psyched on, Megan? I heard rumors of some superstar band playing tonight. Maybe that's it.

Oh shit, seriously? Is that really the Ataris?

Well, he's a little bloated but that's definitely Kris Roe. Must be the Ataris. Or some incarnation of them that is only defined by Roe.

People, us included, watched the Ataris play in Muncie at a festival that we paid $5 to get into. Bummer, dudes.

Brett, Paige, and Zolt are all definitely psyched on seeing their hero.

Anna... not so much.

Brett contemplating existence or some shit.

Shit, Doc's pizza is good.

Anna may hate the Ataris, but boy, does she love Spitshine.

Center Stage's bathrooms must have been a Turkish bath house at some point. Gross.

This band sucked. Lots of old people danced and sang along.

Dude had a boy band headpiece. That was actually pretty cool.

The bathroom is a prime place for cigar information. Actually, it's blunt rolling information. The bathroom is a good place for that.

Later.

Shall we dance? Or maybe just limp around?

2008-10-03T08:34:00.000-07:00

God dammit, I love the Lawrence Arms. This is why.

"First, we laid out some basic themes and attitudes that were really important to us, both in terms of what we wanted to convey and what really made us fall in love with punk music in the first place, and those things were friendship, brotherhood, partying as therapy, not just destructive abuse, but dancing and singing even if the world is falling apart around us. It all sort of boiled down to this us-versus-the-world vibe that’s not confrontational, but empowering. You know, fuck regrets, fuck memories, lets drink and dance and forget all the problems that we’re facing, because frankly, everything’s better if we face it as a team. Maybe it sounds really cheesy, but that’s what we wanted to say (and it’s almost certainly more articulate in the lyric sheet than it is here) and so we had to sing the songs together. It’s about unity..."

Shit, in two weeks I'll be seeing Sundowner and the Falcon in Chicago. I'm going to buy Brendan Kelly so many beers. It's going to be the greatest weekend of my life.

Shit.

An Open Letter to Kyle Manning:

2008-10-02T08:41:00.001-07:00

God dammit, do not put my name in the same sentence as WU-TANG TAT. That's out of the way.

Now, onto the matters at hand. We'll start with Common first. My biggest problem with your "good beat" argument is that COMMON DOES NOT WRITE HIS BEATS. Like almost every hip-hop artist today, they bring in a producer to do that. Go to Wikipedia. Look up Common. Look up each album and find me a track he produced. Oh wait, 2005s Be? Who produced that? KANYE? I bet you like Kanye. Not a good beat by America's favorite black activist/self-proclaimed savior? Come on. There's a reason the dude is at the top.

After typing this, I will add the disclaimer that I'm not dissin' at all. Daddy is merely having fun.

Alright, now Wu-Tang. First off, Wu-Tang started as a way to get all of the MCs known so they could all branch off and start their own solo careers. Why do you think there are 9 dudes in it? Why do you think that 36 Chambers will never compare to the solo shit they did? Liquid Swords, Tical, Return to the 36 Chambers, Ironman? They all blow the clan shit out of the water. So, what makes Wu-Tang so great? Not Redman, I can tell you that. I'll agree the "did it first" argument is weak. Lot's of people "did it first". Gloria Estefan merged traditional Latin music with dance first. Speaking of which, Miami Sound Machine is light years better than Redman. Just saying. Wu-Tang did define the east coast sound. That is nothing to be taken lightly. It doesn't automatically mean that people have to cream their pants all over them. To me, that means that in terms of production, RZA put down a series of beats behind classic soul samples that were the foundation of that style. On the other side of the country, Dre was doing G-funk and synth-ing the shit out of everything. Now, if you want to base your appreciation of a hip-hop album on beats, then do not even try to tell me that "Ain't Nuthin' but a G-Thang" doesn't feature one of the most obnoxious synth sounds of all time. That song is an example of great lyricism, shitty production. And Dre should have never stepped in front of a mic.

Shit, where was I? Westside Connection? Cube lost it after AmeriKKKa's Most Wanted and you know it. You may as well be into Body Count. Yeah, Ice-T is cool to like, right? Especially Cop Killa. That's just novelty shit. Like the Geto Boys, 2 Live Crew, ICP etc. But not Twiztid. They're legit.

God, this is stupid. I'm going to publish it still. I think I made some decent points. How about I end with Wu-Tang rules, Common's pretty good, and east coast kills it over west coast. But honestly, I don't even need to talk about any of this. Illmatic and Ready to Die are the only hip hop albums that matter. All the other shit can get fucked.

In fact, hip hop can get fucked. I'm going to listen to Punk in Drublic.

Why NOFX is the best band of the past two decades

2008-09-30T21:52:00.000-07:00

Eric Melvin took PCP
One night in Hollywood.
It was pretty funny.
He kept saying, "Help me"
Over and over again.
Then he started puking.
That was cool.
Then he passed out.
That was boring.
Oh well

...God dammit, that rules.

To recreate the scene

2008-09-28T12:41:00.000-07:00

Epic homecoming post? ccccccheck.

Through the fog, shone Charlie Cardinal.

High Life was the drink of choice for the day. We went through a brick and box of 24 bottles. The first one was cracked a little after 8:30 a.m. Badass.

Zach, lookin' sexy. His phone was blowing up by 8 a.m.

Evan doing a Dante Love. oooooh, harsh.

Kyle, still drunk from the night before. This was maybe around 11.

Holy shit! This is the most jello shots I will ever see.

I think you missed the trash can, dude. About 30 times.

AMERICA.

Daddy's soup. High Life and gin.

Daddy drinking his soup. Shortly after this, he got busted by a female cop for peeing on the side of a building.

Baberam.

Who knew beer companies designed seasonal packaging.

Anna, talking to Elaine.

Evan, cowering away from the dude she apologized to for knocking over his grill and dumping food all over the ground.

Nap time. We bailed on tailgating at about 2 for sleep.

Christ. Nice park job, moron.

Park job, pt. 2.

Daddy likey!

Zolt, mean muggin'. Surprisingly, everyone seemed to get a little sun.

The following sequence will be called, "Zach has a camera".

BROS.

Check the teeth.

Zach loves Abe.

Megan, probably feeling 100% after Friday night.

I wish you could see the beer running out of my mouth and all over my shirt.

Kyle, puking up beer.

Post-Kyle and I being awesome.

Abram busting a jackass.

Ouch. Nice shot, Holt. Pat agrees.

Evan looking PSYCHED!

High Life Light. Half the calories, all the foam.

I don't know what this is supposed to be a picture of but it reminds me that as Kyle was getting busted for peeing, the cop said "zip it up" which he did and it resulted with him peeing on himself a little. So no one would notice, he just dumped beer all over his crotch.

This is the by far the best picture of the night and a perfect visual description of the night.

I wish I would have tried harder to figure out what was going on in here. This is what used to be Mexico, filled with people grinding all over each other. I couldn't hear any music so I have no idea what they were dancing to.

R.I.P.

Sup, babe? How many licks?

He takes a vodka drink, he takes a whiskey drink

2008-09-25T22:51:00.000-07:00

Being drunk and home by 1:30 on a Thursday? God dammit. I might as well listen to Of Montreal, ride fixed, and only drink gin and tonics. I've lost all credibility I may have had previously. Which, apparently, is none.

Someone put a dead possum on our grill tonight and lit it on fire. If I find out who did it, there will be hell to pay.

Latterman rules.

Fuck you.

Goodnight.

One dead cop, no more donut shops

2008-09-24T10:42:00.000-07:00

I just ate so much hummus that I think my bowels are about to revolt quicker than Boston against the Stamp Act.

Diarrhea is org.

Let America laugh.

2008-09-22T07:27:00.000-07:00

Another short post from Saturday. I'd like to say it was an uneventful night, but no. No. Sometimes I get stuck on Evan's floor, and I'll be god damned if I won't get up for shit. Granted, it was pretty close to 3:30 and everyone left shortly after but, man, it was not one of my better performances.

Elaine is a nice cat. Probably the nicest I know. She likes to be pushed over and have her picture taken.

Maker's and cranberry is the best whiskey drink I've ever had.

Party at Brandon's. Wait, what? You can't tell this is a party? Looks like a regular soirée. A gathering of the towns biggest socialites.

...pfffffffffff. This is not an attack on Brandon or his party, but rather upon Mr. Party-Time, here. Good one, dude.

Sassy babes get dressed up. Some dude asked Evan for a kiss which is really, really funny. To me, at least.

Not a great picture, but I was trying to demonstrate how when we go places, our booze will typically make it through the party unscathed. High Life, Colt, and Sparks? Alright, I'm sure people would go for the Sparks.

Muncie, America's cutest small, midwestern town.

Nights like this won't be avoided, not by me

2008-09-20T14:02:00.000-07:00

Jimmy John's cup and Old Style? Public drinking?

Nurses, Evangelicals, Wye Oak, and Prayer Breakfast turned out a pretty good crowd.

Justin diggin' Evangelicals. They sounded like the Shins and came to the after party.

Prayer Breakfast killed it as always.

DJ Bloodfaggot and his dus.

DJ Dillhole.

This party was by far better than last time. It may have been the best party I've ever been to. Definitely the most packed.

Probably Justice or some shit.

I will point out, I did not throw this party nor did either of my roommates. I found out about it Thursday. I didn't pay for this keg. $3 for a cup of foam. People were bummed.

Angus.

Julian showed up, crowd surfed, and almost got his head cut off by the fan.

Jesus, who invited Flav?

What up, Bro-ey?

Party-thrower number one, Bechtel. Him and Justin Spring brought the keg, the people, and ultimately, the party. They also matched their bandannas to their shirts.

This is right after we spotted Chase making out with this chick and yelled at him. COCK BLOCK. Bummer, bro.

Flavor Flav and now 16 year olds? What kind of party is this?

Friendship circle.

Naked, sweaty dudes dancing. Christ.

Ay bay-bay.

I think Anna was trying to look confused by the naked dudes. She looks more smug than anything.

BROS.

Julian's got a girlfriend. They're into each other.

Excuse me, Bubba? I think you spelled that wrong. It's F-o-r-s-t-e-r. We had to make a mid-party beer run to avoid drinking foam.

I'm just going to call this series of pictures the Brett Chronicles. Ever heard of a U-neck t-shirt?

Zach's siked on Brett's condition.

Personal Jesus.

The housewife from HELL.

This is probably my favorite picture of the night.

All in all, it was a killer party. Anyone who didn't make it, you blew it.

Ya can't go home, but ya can't stay here

2008-09-19T07:39:00.000-07:00

The Chug's blessing. Too bad the Chug is a curse in itself.

BUSTED. I praised Crom while others moped.

American Idol!

America's Got Talent! Hey Ya!

Busted foosball table means air hockey. Megan... check.

Dan-boy put up a good fight, but couldn't step.

Yart! 3 for 3.

Beer, pre-Binkley match.

Pat stepped up and came out ahead. 3 for 4.

Beer, post-Binkley.

Anna? Effectively handled.

Woe is Anna. Apparently.

God. Victory shot, I think. This signals portrait time.

Megan is the only person I know that will purposely take a really awful picture of themselves.

Hay, Ray.

No one plays pool at the Chug.

People got siked on this but it was a false alarm. I, again, praised Crom.

Chug's "facilities". Pat just discovered that you can flush this thing. As I was taking this, some dude walked in and I told him I was taking a picture of my dick. He looked weirded out.

The last thing I remember. Aside from cutting the fuck out of my finger on Evan's razor. God dammit.
Later.

Prayer Breakfast tonight.

Do you guys have Lickey, Lickey?

2008-09-17T05:00:00.000-07:00

I've not been posting on weekdays since school started. This is obviously because I'm not carrying my camera around on campus. This is also because not much interesting stuff happens throughout the day. Unless you count my American government class. But taking pictures of "non-traditional" and "politically-minded" students making really inane statements regarding politics, or in the case of non-traditional students, the politics of yesteryear, is not necessarily interesting subject matter.

Anyway, yesterday I was supposed to have a 2-liter bottle for my Biology lab. Guess what we made? Oh shit, a terrarium? Good guess. It was 9:00 a.m., my class was at 10, and I neglected to buy a 2-liter the night before. This means I had to run to the VP, buy a bottle of grape Crush for $1.08, come back to work at 9:20 and think to myself, "I wonder how much of that I can finish before class".

I drank about half, or .54 cents worth. Not bad in 20 minutes, especially for warm grape soda. Let's make a challenge out of it. The stipulations are 1) it must be warm grape Crush 2) it must be drank out of a cup and 3) you have 20 minutes. Let's see you avoid getting sick, sucka.

I'm bored and at work for the next two and a half hours, so I'll post a couple things I've been psyched on lately:

Web-cam-stop-motion-thing. It's like people watching. There's thousands and thousands of fucking lame people for you to go through and look at the stupid shit they do. There's also tons of tits, dicks, and pussies. You just have to dig deep enough. I also like to play "this looks like someone we know" with Anna.

Punk rock videos suck so hard. Why is that?

Thank god they don't suck live.

And speaking of The Lawrence Arms, I really like Brendan Kelly's blog. It makes me lolz on a pretty consistent basis. There's other things I like now. One of those things is not school.

Who are we, but savages hooked on accessories

2008-09-14T13:34:00.000-07:00

This may be my worst post ever. I blew it and forgot my camera before going to Erik's party. Whatevs. Harvey DJ'd, people got wrecked and danced. Cool.

Hey, babe. What up?

E, N!

America's Best Dance Crew.

Taking pictures of taking pictures.

EMO. LULZ.

Nice whip, my man.

I kept the light on, so I could see you when the rain came

2008-09-13T11:31:00.000-07:00

This is Forster sucking ass at Resident Evil 4. He played this boss for something close to an hour. I've been spending a lot of time lately watching him play this game.

This is the way to start your night out right. This shit has been making it into the news lately because the CSPI is trying to get it banned. I guess it's really appealing to 14 year olds.

Where tha party at?

I don't know whose this was but sorry, dude.

Compliments of Zach.

Dude, when's Burning Man?

We headed over to a party on Riverside. DJ Harv was there. I don't know whose house it was.

Z, macking on hoes.

What up, Binkley? Dude, let's watch your Rise part.

Bechtel, lookin' sassy.

Jesus, gayfag. Nice picture of the rain.

I don't wanna hear it, I know you're full of shit

2008-09-07T18:33:00.000-07:00

Kegger at Jake and Evan's. I'm pretty sure it was Keystone but then again, it was a keg.

Megan bothered me about taking a picture of her, so I positioned her in front of sailor boy to make up for missing a photo on Friday.

There's talk of having this thing resurfaced soon. This had better mean cookout, beer, and skatejam.

I told Pat to put down a blunt fingerflip. He got the blunt fakie, but couldn't reel in the fingerflip. Chase's brother, Tyler, got launched into the wall a few times and wound up on flat a few more. I came out of a front and back D, a few too many beers deep, relatively unscathed. Tight.

Speaking of Chase and Tyler, here's a bad photograph where you can't see how exactly alike they look. When I walked into the party, I thought Tyler was Chase. Then babbled about it all night. Sorry, dudes.

Zack showed up after going to a Reds/Cubs game with Julian. He was also drinking. I'd heard that he does now before, but I'm pretty sure it was Muncie's first time seeing Zackdrinking.

Man, the night was a Zac(k)h attack. Here's Zach number 2. Although it could also be Evan because there's beer all over his shirt.

I don't know where Megan found this, but I hope it was consented by the snake's owner. It wouldn't surprise me if it weren't.

I think I was supposed to caption this with EMO SUPERSTARS. Kyle and I regaled Zach #3 all night about Kinsella shit. Sorry, bro.

Chillin' with the wizzzzzzz. Or whiz because this was above the toilet.

Feelin' funny in my mind, Lord, I believe I'm fixin' to die

2008-09-06T11:18:00.000-07:00

Kyle started the night off right by eating a whole Heorot pizza, drinking a Sparks, then taking a shot of 12 Year Jameson. Then ruping. A lot.

Swimming in a sea of red. Wait, tailgating? Seriously? At least I can say I did it. I know we played Navy and that's only because they were walking around in uniform.

This was the only Pabst in the joint. I can guarantee that.

Janis Joplin was reincarnated into a big lady who sings covers of Tom Petty songs at Ball State tailgate parties. Sweet.

Who let these hipster shits in? Nice boots, grr.

Chase said something about this dood appealing to "cool" kids by being weird and quirky like a Wes Anderson film. If you go to that website, the guy talks to you.

Dang, dog. Arbor Mist? Someone was rollin' classy.

AUSTIN 3:16, 2008.

This is Forster doing "whip-its". You release nitrous oxide into the balloon and then inhale it. It makes you sound like James Earl Jones. It also makes you look like a high schooler.

Kyle, post whip it.

Justin in his PRIME.

I forgot how good this stuff is. Too bad drinking Hamm's means that Mo'z iz clozed and we're at the Chug until further notice.

It's all about the he says she says bullshit

2008-09-03T20:57:00.000-07:00

In light of the Republican Convention (which I am not watching) I present to you:
Ol' Glory.
I heard they were passing this shit out to everyone in St. Paul.

What's up Pete? How much did you pay for yours? I paid $1.

Where else could you find a) this beverage, b) at an everyday low, low price, and c) in mass quantities? WAAAALLLL-MART.

I would also like to take this time to point out that I don't care about politics. I'll leave it at that to avoid any flack I may catch for saying more.

Josef Beuys was rescued by nomads called the Tartars. They wrapped him in fat.

2008-09-02T21:00:00.000-07:00

Josef Beuys also sat in a gallery for six hours, face covered in honey and gold leaf, explaining his dumpy drawings to a dead hare. People watched him.

I draw pictures of cats.

Drawing project numero uno for this semester:

And what do we learn? To kill better.

2008-08-30T22:35:00.000-07:00

This is supposed to be Creole Kid, the Village's latest addition. Minus a flash, it looks like puke on a plate.

Schlitz. Blatz. Schaefer. Carling's Black Label. Punk rock.

Thanks, Annazone.

Lost up Knob Creek without a paddle. It took a little more than an hour to finish this.

Dave was in town for the big VGR show. Justin actually had to tell him to close his eyes for this picture because if they were open, people would question its authenticity.

Justin and I went middle school (and in my case, high school) on our dry erase board with Pokemon and Dragon Ball Z. KAMEHAMEHA!

Bar's water must be out again.

Kyle and the Org Special. Whiskey in one hand, Pabst in the other.

Mo's resident pool shark, Big Ben.

Babez looking psyched.

-Neil, why so chipper? You just had to work the door all night.
-I heard Whitney pays well. Wink.

There was a story behind this dude. I can't remember what it was, but I do remember him seeming super gay and flailing about the bar all night.

Red shirt headbutted me, knocked my pool stick in mid shot, and aimlessly wandered all night. I think something finally clicked that he was too wasted to be functioning and he dipped. Piece, brah!

Fresh like a box of Krispy Kremes

2008-08-24T21:35:00.000-07:00

This was just the dance floor. There twice this many people scattered around the house. Not too shabby for our first party. The Greenhouse is still alive and kicking.

DJ Harv killed it.

There was a séance going on out back. Or a pow wow because I'm pretty sure there were drugs involved.

BINKLEY

I was trying to take a picture of Abe's coozie, but I blew it.

Chase with his face cut off because my photography skills were on point.

Woolley.

The house potion was gone by like 1. Mike said that was a record.

We did not put this sticker here.

Abe is a pretty good example of how pretty much everyone looked. It was super hot. Thank god the cops shut us down. Thanks to the police and our neighbors. YART! WOOP WOOP, that's the sound of the police. The dudes also talked shit on Old Style while they were leaving with the biggest boners they'll have in a while.

The Hella DVD played on the big screen all night. I also played the Lightning Bolt DVD. Justin was the only one who really appreciated either.

Dustyn came just in time for the music to be done. Sorry, brah.

Gavin and Jessie, the last of our guests. Incidentally, they were also the first.

LATER

I'm on the Dyno with the black mags

2008-08-23T16:14:00.000-07:00

Typically your trainer will give you advice on how to defeat your opponent. This is what he told me.
-Note- I haven't played Punch Out in a while and forgot how to beat this fat fuck.

RACISM! YAY!

Pro status.

This is either a) Peter Cavanaugh's vomit or b) a burnt up bag of hamburger maggot shit.

Beauty salon! What up Forster?
-Note- Forster is not a spelling error.

Red curry.

Compliments of Steve. Beam's Eight Star: a sign of quality. Not to be confused with real Jim Beam, this stuff was eight bucks a pint.

PUNK ROCK HOMOS!

Evan loves boooooze!

This happy couple just got married!

People have been stealing my camera a lot lately.

Steve-boy's last night in town. Good luck in Omaha, my dude!

Gay-ree. I wish this picture were better so you could see his iced out gauges.

Bad picture, but Forster loves eating hot dogs with Nunchunks that were cooked by the devil. Nice one, Evan.

I want something else, to get me through this semi-charmed kinda life

2008-08-21T08:31:00.000-07:00

I hear Foster's is Australian for piss.

Thanks, Mags!

Not David Cross.

Get some gears, dude. This is right after Peter hauled balls at about 80 mph to catch up to some bros that just heckled us.

I'm pretty sure this is Anna's glow stick handlebar mustache.

Where's this place at and why am I not there?

Chong spotting.

METAL

I think the dude that drew this was talking about C.S. Lewis all night.

Obligatory Kyle face.

Peace out, Lou. Have fun in D.C. with one of the nation's biggest homeless populations. And Bad Brains' hometown.

Candid? Yart!

This is approximately 20 seconds before Peter hocked a loogie at me. Thanks bro.

Megan stole my camera. Rockin' the right sweatshirt, Walsh.

Anna with fake glasses. Megan creeeeeping.

I'm not sure what I was trying to take a picture of, but you can see Bechtel macking hardcore.

PIECE!

I'm the best man, I deed it.

2008-08-17T20:02:00.000-07:00

Must be summer.

Beers, bikes, broads.

Yart. I like to imagine a 65 year old riding fixed.

That's a little better. I hope some 15 year old did these.

Art fag

Art fag pt. deux courtesy of Justin.

Gavin right after I spilled his $4 or $5 dollar beer and replaced it with a Blatz. No prob, bro.

Over the Top. I may or may not have lost...
I lost.

Xena, Warrior Princess.

Victory shot.

Anna's roofie protection. Thanks, T-Harv.

Woodstock '99.

I didn't know a second grade teacher decorated Mo's.

I was specifically requested to caption this photo with ffffffffffaded.

Watch your right, watch your left, watch the center, and watch your back!

2008-08-16T12:09:00.000-07:00

Brew choice for the night. $13.49 for a brick... -edit- I claimed it tastes better than Pabst but I cannot make such a blasphemous statement.

Somehow I knew living with Kyle, our fridge would end up looking like this.

Seriously?

Lou Dawg. Soon to be Washington D.C. resident. Good luck, dewd!

Textmaster, Foreverheart.

Bechtel used patriotism to wipe the table on Anna and I. He absorbed the power of the flag into his headband which then traveled to his hands.

Justin loves drinking!!!!

SPORTS! We'll cut some slack because it's the Olympics. Actually, watching the Olympics at a bar is pretty sweet.

Party time.

WHOA, BRO

Babez with 'tude pt. deuce.

Let's live like there's no place else better in the world!

2008-08-15T07:25:00.000-07:00

AMERICA

Pabst Blue Ribbon, fake meat, and corn on the cob.

My worst nightmare.

Euchre and Pabst? What kind of old folks home have we stumbled into?

Wait, what? This is a bar? Thank god I only drink beer and never have to piss. yart!

This is what happens when the bar's water is out. Pissin' on walls!

Asshole Adam and Dickhole Dan. DO NOT play these dudes in foosball.

Muncie's favorite gay bartender.

Sam's in town!

Still want to be my state fair baby?

Johanna chuggin' a brewsky after making her fiftieth Turkey Tom for the night. JJ's crew fall '08

Who knew Basquiat lived in Muncie.

PDA. Must be around last call.

Greenhouse? Potion Castle? Fagzone?

Be cool fool, they ain't gonna roll up, all they want is fuckin' donuts

2008-08-14T16:23:00.000-07:00

Dinner.

Wait, what day is it? Scotty's? Oh, it's Wednesday.

Man of the hour, Kyle, mean muggin'. Happy Birthday, dewd.

Wait, Justin. You're back and 21!? And at the bar? TIIIIGHT!

SPORTS. Actually, Dan Bailey destroying everyone who steps to the table.

TAKE A PICTURE OF ME IN MY PRIIIME!!!!

The carnage after I destroyed the table. I was solids but it could have very easily been the other way around.

Kyle's birthday bash included a DJ.
-How do you feel about that Justin?

-...oh

HIPSTERS

-Ray, how you feelin' tonight?
-Just saved five lives. Doin' pretty well. Just need about 15 more whiskey and cokes in me and tonight will be perfect.

Babes with 'tude.

Kyle. Face. Anna's shirt is wet because of white t to the left of Justin. She threw her drink at him afterwards. Ain't nuthin' ta fuck with.

MUSTACHEFU! Double fistin' dranks. yart yart yart yart yart yart

Rad dude Dustyn. CHONG.

Later my dudes.

Way back, when I had the red and black lumberjack, with tha hat to match

2008-08-13T17:24:00.000-07:00

Grillmaster. Yeah right!

Hi, I'm Bobby Flay. Welcome to my food blog. Stuffed and grilled green and banana peppers .

Tasty treats? Especially when Foster covers his in 2 lbs. of chocolate syrup.

Dude knows his place in the scheme of things. Get me a Kyle Manning and some waffle fries. Fer free!

Bike gang! Two dudes killed it with tail whips both foot jam and regs. The rest lurked hard.

Why wouldn't you want a cat? Nice one, dudes.

Huhz? Top pukey ash those pans? Welcome to Mo's.

The song is the single and the single sucks

2008-08-11T14:52:00.000-07:00

I can never light a grill properly, so grilled vegetables soon became roasted vegetables.

ARTIST

This vile looking mess made tea.

Girls r funnnny. And mean-spirited.

Interior designers.

This is the way we ball

2008-08-09T13:36:00.000-07:00

New crib. Greenhouse 2K8

SET UP. Who has a Dreamcast I can have?

Babez cook me dinner when I demand it.

NARDZ. Courtesy of Dustyn, I believe.